10.23.2005

Being a Transvestite is Forever

I wish that feeling of disgust and revulsion would last. If it did, maybe I could lead a normal life. Maybe I could have sex with women instead of jerking off in their lingerie. But the sissy desires always come back. Being a transvestite is forever.

Often, by the time I get home from the mall, I already want to change into clean panties. The frilliest, laciest ones I own. Then I'll put on that negligee, or my new pumps, or the skirt I tried on at The Gap. I'll look at myself in the mirror and think about the smirking saleswoman who asked if I needed help, or the teenage girls who burst out laughing the instant they saw me. I couldn't be more pathetic. I couldn't be more of a sissy. And then, because I am what I am, I lie on my bed, lifting up my legs up so that I can see my high heels in the mirror. I'm such a faggot transvestite, I tell my reflection out loud. I arch my ass up until I can see the bottom of my panties under my skirt. I'm such a sissyboy, I say, shoving a pillow under my small, now hard-again cock. Lust and self-loathing swirl in me as I start to rub my pantied-clad dick into the pillow. Fucking it up and down, back and forth. Faster and faster. Curling my toes in my pointy high heels. Feeling my bra straps dig in my shoulders. Mouth open, gasping, crying out softly. Until I'm cumming in my panties again. Cumming the only way I can. A masturbating transvestite. A sissyboy faggot.

This is the only way I'll ever be.

26 comments:

Jamie Michelle said...

Hi, SissyStacy! I saw your post on the http://www.forced-sissy.com/phpbb/index.php forum.

Is this a picture of yourself?: http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2387/1771/1600/4569.jpg

If so you are very beautiful.

I'm a crossdressing sissy-faggot, too. I'm also "out of the closet" and go out dressed en femme. I don't try to "pass," I just go out as a sissy.

Being a sissy-faggot transvestite is a wonderful thing once you fully come to accept yourself.

Keep being your nice sissy self and don't let the world get you down.

Love,

Jamie Michelle

http://profiles.yahoo.com/femmejamie

sissy gina said...

Dear sissy stacy,
You are so right in that being a transvestite is forever. You may find other things which will divert you from your sissy activities for days or even months, but being a sissy transvestite is a fundamental part of who we are and it will never go away.

You will always have your sexual arrousal associated with wearing girls panties and other lingerie. You know that you can never be a "real man" and no woman will ever accept you as such. You are, as you state, a sissyboy faggot.

I wonder if you will stay as you are (a masturbating sissy male transvestite) or whether you will venture into other areas. Perhaps you can share your thoughts on whether you have considered going out as a girl rather than a sissy boy, or whether you have considered relationships with others as a girl or a sissy boy.

Anonymous said...

Nice story. I also like to play dressup. I love the feel of soft nylon leotards and tights. I sometimes wear a skirt especially ballet wrapskirts or a tutu. The feeling is just so sissy I have to come in them. Have fun. Jamie.

Sissy Faggot Monica said...

Perfect. You ARE such a sissy faggot boy. And you love it. You have no choice but to love it because as you say - being a sissy faggot transvestite is FOREVER. There is no escape from your desires. THAT is why you (at least I) need to feel humiliated. Why? Because we need it. We know we are not real men, no matter how much we pretend! And we like to dress like girlie boys and feel the need to be punished for being such sissy faggots - humiliation is our punishment, but it just makes us more sissy. And we need that. Constant reminder that we are not real mean and never ever will be. Ever! And I agree that if you dress at all like a girl - you are a sissy faggot and you want have sissy faggot sex. period. no exceptions. All these so called sissies that pretend they aren't faggots are just lying to themselves and should be ashamed to call themselves sissies. I like women too, but I cannot be a real man with them in bed. I am a sissy and must act like one in order to be sexually excited. I have had a few brief sexual encounters with other sissies too. I try to tell myself that I'll never be with a man, but let's be honest - I will probably become a sissy slut. A cock whore. There is no way ANY so called "man" dresses up like a girl and likes to feel feminine that doesn't want some cock in his mouth and ass. Deep and hard.

Lots of boys, me included, think they wanted to be girls. I've come to realize I don't want to be a girl. ever. I just want to be a sissy boy. I want everyone to know that no matter how pretty, how girlie, that I am really just a sissy faggot in girls clothes dressed and acting like a frilly sissy faggot boy FOREVER. There is NO ESCAPE and I don't want one.

Anonymous said...

Love the heading - just about sums it up, doesn't it?

I was quite a mess until I finally realized it was me and forever. Now I just accept it and enjoy myself.

My first orgasm was in skirts, stockings and slip and now many years later nothing has changed, except of course that I regularly take cock now. What a sissy slut I have become! And I enjoy every minute of it.

Thanks for your blog - it's great.

Love,

diane

Anonymous said...

SissyStacy,

You are not alone. I am a big time crossdressing Sissy faggot also. I don't go out in public though. In addition to your shame, I am also a cuckold. I made the mistake of trying to live a normal life. After a number of years of trying to include my wife in my interests, I had to give up. I can't even get it up without wearing women's clothing and my wife wants nothing to do with it. I thought we would get divorced. She had other ideas. She didn't want to risk the possible loss of life style a divorce was likely to cause and didn't want her family to have the discomfort of the divorce. So, she is allowed to have sex with anyone she wishes and in return does not divulge that I am a sissy transvestite.

pantyboysissy said...

I Enjoyed your story,because I feel I have so much in common. cuz I am a real sissy ass freak too. I have to wear high heels and panties just to get arroused. I was in a check out line and I had my clogs on. and the woman behind me kept smerking. I walk to my car and she was next to me and said in a low tone Fag..I was turned on by it. pantyboy

Anonymous said...

I used a pillow to until my mom caught me LOL.

Anonymous said...

its ok to be a transvestite. im a crossdresser and i have had sex with 2 girls at differnt times fully dressed as a girl. they really liked it, they really got into it, they made me their bitch it was a lot of fun.

Anonymous said...

i also like to fantise about being fucked and treated like the sissyboy i am. i have only been fucked by one guy(multiple times) and few girls but i really like being fucked like a bitch for either of them, i love being dressed up and sucking the dick getting it ready to fuck me. or having a girl fuck me with a strap on.

Anonymous said...

is there like a dating service or something where people like us can meet or get together? if so i would really like to meet someone wo enjoys dressing up and the liestyle as much as me. it would be nice to be with someone who enjoys the same interests of being a cock/panty crazed sissyboy crossdresser. there is nothing sexier then a cock in a pair of panties. other than an hard cock with me pullimg the panties aside as i grip his balls and slide my mouth up and down his throbing hard cock and tightening my lips as i swirl my tounge around the head of his fat cock.

-Becky crossdresser.

Anonymous said...

i recently found out my boyfriend cheated on me , I want revenge and no he likes to dress girly I told him I wanted real man and not a sissy pantyboy , if anyone wants to laugh at him it mn.ryan@yahoo.ie

Anonymous said...

The alleged "girl" who is saying that her boyfriend cheated on her is a phony. It's the actual guy wanting people to email him to make fun of him. Google his email, he posts the same thing under different idtentites all over the internet.

Just hire a pro domme and be done with it , idiot!

StarroftheNite said...

Oh, Stacy, the best part for you is that you are only starting down the path to being a boy-bytch sissy who craves cock and cum. Before long, you'll be craving a dildo and a butt-plug, and when you masturbate you will strive to cum without ever touching your little male appendage. Will you choose another CD Sissy or an Admirer to be the person who takes your cherry? I envy you all the wonderful things that you are about to experience for the first time. Nowadays, all I want is to have the hand of a man stroke me around my waist and butt, and I want to go down on my knees begging him to choose whether he wants his cock in my mouth or my ass. It's a Wonderful Life, darling, Wonderful!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

sounds like me

Barron4u said...

wow you are so hot..I don't dress up at all, however thinking of sucking a tranny's cock when they are in full drag turns me on.I have never exeperienced this fantasy as of yet and I'm 38..If it ever happens I hope they are as beautiful as u..

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Anonymous said...

I admit, for years I have been telling myself that I am a straight happily married male. I am so wrong. I purposely wear girls leggings over tights with ballet flats to the mall. I spray myself with ultra girly perfume and throw on a sweater set. My nails are painted light pink and I put on glossy pink lipstick. I love being a sissy fag. Nothing is more exciting as being in a mall as a male looking like a swishy sissy. I LOVE it when teen girls stare and laugh at me, it makes me soo excited. I have no desire to be " passable" but rather a limp wristed sissy male who secretly craves big juicy cocks.

Anonymous said...

It is forever. I first put mummy's stockings at age 8 and came in her panties then too I have crossdresser my whole life but have never had any samesex contact. I wish I could meet another pretty crossdresser who would. Let me kiss. Her penis, maybe cum on me.

Anonymous said...

I can't get over how much I want to be with another crossdresser. I watch the movies, dream of being with to slowly lower another CDs silky panties and finally kiss the erect penis head i crave so much. Why am I so gay? My fantasyis to go to a,gay bar(none where I live) and suck cock in a glory hole dressed like a slut.want to walk out dripping in hot man cum.want a boyfriend to make me suck and sit on his penis.want a video of me getting fucked. Want to make out with a handsome guy in a gay movie house and let other guys watch me cocksuck. Please pull off my panties, I need cock.

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Anonymous said...

I so want a nother gurl to be with. I will be a good, obedient gurl, I promise! Just let me love a sissy, please?
Roxanne